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                Dear Stefan Molynieux
I am writing because my partner is legally separated but doesn't want to get a divorce from his ex wife of 6 years and it is making me feel resentment and angst in our relationship.
We have been together just over two years and living together for 6 months. Our relationship otherwise is amazing. We share dreams that we are already working towards achieving such as starting a farm and building a house. We both have kids from our past relationships and I feel like we can successfully communicate about co-parenting struggles and healthily communicate about concerns we have with each other as they arise. He is my best friend and the person I spend most if not all of my time with. We have an amazing sex life and are both very attracted to one another.
I have brought up the topic of him getting a divorce multiple times and we worked together on the paperwork and submitted it. There were some hurdles related to a child support affidavit form and the papers were returned incomplete early this year. We have not worked on it again since.
I have tried to reflect on why it bothers me so much he is not divorced and have come to the conclusion whether rational or not, that I feel like I am "second best". I am not sure how to overcome this. I initially thought it was related to jealousy but am not so sure that is the case.
We live in a small town and I encounter his ex spouse frequently in passing during the week. It brings up a tingling of resentment at every crossing of paths and is making me resentful even in occasions where he attends his child's shared birthday party, even though I know it shouldn't.
I am otherwise a reasonable, calm and confident person albeit with a very stubborn streak. This is something my partner also shares. As it relates to this discussion, he states that divorce is just a government piece of paper and that it doesn't matter to him. I have acknowledged this and rebutted with the fact that for whatever reason it does matter to me.
I will continue to try tactics and let this go as I don't want something so stupid to affect our otherwise great relationship but I am struggling...
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In this Flash X Space from 30 October 2025, philosopher Stefan Molyneux recounts his challenging childhood marked by neglect and systemic failures in welfare systems. He highlights the lack of support from social services and educators, arguing these institutions often exacerbate dependency. Engaging with callers, Molyneux calls for societal reflection on indifference and urges listeners to advocate for meaningful change to combat cycles of neglect.
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