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28 January 2024 Sunday Morning Livestream
I would like to know how UPB handles the idea off forgiving our enemies or at least those who choose to do us harm? Getting them out of lives if they don't repent/apologize/make amends I agree with. But is it best to just let go of anger over things and people that can not be changed.
Some situations are really clear, like an attack in the moment. Some situations are unclear, like a perceived slight from an acquaintance or someone cutting you off in traffic. We feel anger automatically. It's a natural, subjective response. But we need to reflect on the context and evaluate our next actions to ensure morality. My dad used to get angry if you looked at him the wrong way. His reaction was out of proportion.
As I understood the forgiveness as a Christian, we forgive our enemies as a mechanism to lay down our angry, release ourselves from said anger and give it over the crime to God for vengeance. (Though practically if those who wronged us committed criminal acts against us, we follow all the legal avenues for redress, but not with anger but cold commitment to justice without hate.)
Reconciliation on the other hand requires both parties.
Much of my pain in life. Has been because I ignored my anger. Trained to disconnect by my parents. Now I choose to listen to my body and my emotions. That shift of mindset took a lot of effort.
How can you remove yourself in the days of social media? Allegations can follow you anywhere.
Can vengeance be defined as taking action to harm someone (when you aren't in immediate danger) in order satisfy your anger. This is why imprisonment isn't vengeance if you are not doing it satisfy anger but instead to uphold standards.
Justice is measured. And not done with massive emotional motivation. Hence the judge and jury.
My understanding is that if forgiving our enemies was UPB/universal, Bob would have forgiven Jack for whatever behaviour/action/words he believed justified hitting Jack. Yet society will go to Jack and insist he forgive Bob but not ask Bob not to hit Jack and forgive instead.
Is mercy virtuous?
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In this episode, I examine the complexities of social anxiety linked to internalized critical voices from parents. Using a metaphor of facing a bully, I discuss how self-attack emerges as a defense mechanism against childhood abuse. I emphasize the need for open conversations with parents and the importance of therapy in navigating these issues.
I also propose reframing inner critics as protective forces rather than adversaries, advocating a healthier self-relationship. I conclude by outlining a tripartite approach to healing that involves addressing external criticism, reshaping our inner narratives, and fostering self-kindness, encouraging listeners to pursue their own paths to healing.
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